Greetings!
I estimate that it will take you around 7 minutes to read today’s newsletter, but it’s impossible to measure things like that so really … who can say?
Name drops today: Blockie (always), Garrick Higgo (of course), Scottie (duh) and unripened bananas.
I’m sorry to whoever we had slotted in today’s sponsorship slot, but I’m going to have to run it back with yesterday’s sponsor, Garmin.
Garrick Higgo, my man, can I interest you in a Garmin S70 for the remainder of the year? Sure, it keeps things like heart rate (yours seems low) and step count (probably high), but it also keeps hours and minutes, and even seconds (!) to keep you from incurring a 2-stroke penalty at your next major championship round.
During your casual golf, you can also measure distance to the front, middle and back of greens — I’m sure all the courses you play are among the 43,000 preloaded into Garmin’s library! — and keep your score right there on the watch face.
It’s a phenomenal device, and given that you’ve made over $7 million in your career, more than affordable for someone in your tax bracket (and most others, too). If you’re reading, you should check it out right here.
OK, now onto the news.
[Jason here] This round 1 scrapple leaderboard goes to six because I would need many more seconds to find a visual that captures Alex Smalley.
1. I did not think we would be leading Round 1 of my PGA thoughts with … Garrick Higgo, but we may have gotten the most normal sport moment(s) of the year about an hour into the golf on Thursday.
Higgo shot 67 but had it bumped up to a 69 because at 7:18:00 a.m. local time, he was not standing on the mown-down green rectangle where his playing partners were teeing off.
Higgo, if you somehow haven’t heard by now, was seconds late to his tee time on Thursday. What is difficult for me to understand is that he actually showed up early, left to hit some putts and then didn’t make it back before the watch of the official running the festivities (maybe he had a Garmin S70?) struck 7:18:00.
I couldn’t get enough of Higgo’s explanation(s). Here were just a few of the sentences he said, with corresponding links to either video or the transcripts.
1. “I was obviously there on time, but late.” (link)
2. “It's unfortunate that golf has these kind of situations where ... things we get penalized for ... things.” (link)
3. "One second is tough to define." (link)
Me reading that third one …
We’re not even close to done!
4. “I wouldn't have been late if I knew I was running late.” (Link)
5. “I was just trying to get evidence. I feel like any of you would have done the same. It's kind of … I was there on time, but the rule is, if you're one second late, you're late. So if you think about it, I was there on time, if you know what I mean.” (Link)
Me …
6. “Like, I was there at 7:18, 30 seconds, you know what I mean?” (Link)
7. (7:18 was the tee time?) “Yeah, or something like that, 7:19, whatever it was. I don't know.” (Link)
Just over here howling at all of this. Completely insane.
Although it led to some all-time commentary on Twitter.
Part of me feels like we should just end the newsletter there. Nothing this week is going to top that. The undercurrent here is that majors always bring about weird stuff like this because majors make for such a strange and uncomfortable environment for players. They are often unaccustomed to how major weeks feel, and so bizarre moments like this that sometimes happen at regular events always seem to happen during these four weeks.
Never miss a f̶a̶i̶r̶w̶a̶y̶ tee time again with the Titleist ProV1 Second.
2. And since we’re talking rules … I know there are probably plenty of purist reasons why this rule exists, but I’m just not sure anyone will ever convince me that a ball hit into the thick rough off of the fairway should be allowed to be placed on the fairway for a second shot like Rahm did on No. 10 today.
Where Rahm hit his tee shot.
Where he hit his second shot from.
That’s not a Rahm subtweet. I said the same thing about Scottie at Oakmont last year and J.J. Spaun at the Players last year, as well.
In a game defined by single shots and often even inches or millimeters (or seconds!), I do not understand how the positioning of a sprinkler head can have such an effect on the outcome of such an important event.
What if Josh Allen slipped on 4th and 1 at the end of the third quarter in the second round of the NFL playoffs next year, and the referees said they were gonna do the play over because there was paint from the Bills logo where he stepped. That’s not that far away from what happened here!
Extreme normal sport behavior, and a rule that I have yet to be convinced makes any sense at all.
3. The Rory-Spieth-Rahm group was so much fun to watch. I’m normally not a huge supergroups fan, but those three are so different as people and stylistically as players that it really worked. They are also three of the most meme-able players in the world. Rahm and Spieth are definitely in the top three. I’d put Bryson ahead of Rory, though Rory has definitely had his moments.
As far as the actual golf, I have no idea what to think after the first round.
Rory said he played like “shit,” which is a great description of exactly how he played. He hit 5 of 14 fairways while Spieth — Jordan Alexander Spieth! — hit 12 of 14 and nearly led the field in driving. Rahm started slow and had me typing unspeakable things about what LIV has done to his major career before somehow — as podcast co-host, Hayden Martin, pointed out to me — shooting the same score as Spieth (69), which felt impossible for 17.5 holes until it actually happened. There is no way those two should have both shot 69, but they did.
As for whether I’m buying what Spieth is selling. No, I’m not. Do not put it in the papers that I was emotionally invested five shots into his round and that I quietly whispered to myself things like, Please find the right plateau on this green all morning while envisioning Rory and Spieth stomping into Shinnecock like it’s 2015 all over again and they held all four majors at once.
Do not print that.
herewegoagain.gif
4. This golf course — which I was led to believe would be a bomb-and-gouge festival! — was absolutely not a bomb-and-gouge festival. Proper major championship setup, and it had a lot of Southern Hills in it today. I thought it was tremendous.
Rory was wrong earlier in the week, and he admitted it on Thursday.
There … certainly is a penalty for missing the fairway. Probably more than what I anticipated after being here two Fridays ago.
Rory McIlroy | 2026 PGA
The setup even had Rory talking angles into some of these greens, which makes sense given the treacherous pin positions.
As I said before the tournament started, the PGA has a branding issue that is incongruent with its best tournaments and tournament venues for the last decade (Kiawah, Southern Hills, Bethpage), which have rocked for the most part.
The Mink — at least through the first round — seems to fall into that “great championship course, great golf tournament” bucket much more so than it falls into the Valhalla/Bellerive bucket of “questionable course, but at least we got some big names involved!”
How much is a second worth at The Mink?
5. My one fear for the rest of the week is something Andy talked about at Oak Hill. Will the fairways get too firm to hold, thus reducing the skill of shaping it both ways such that everyone just ends up in the rough and it becomes a big wedge out contest?
Here’s Rahm.
A lot of those fairways are sloped in a way that they play very narrow. Like 15 today, I thought I was going to be in the fairway undoubtedly, and I was off the fairway. Same on 10, same on 4. It can easily roll off.
Jon Rahm | 2026 PGA
That’s something to keep an eye on.
Regardless, the PGA seems to have nailed the golf course through one day, and there apparently (and thankfully) wasn’t enough rain to cheapen the Mink Experience.
Phil Scottie was right!
Also, I thought Soly nailed why the setup worked and what differentiated it from, say, some past U.S. Opens as well as parts of Oak Hill, particularly the part about wide fairways plus rough.
Jason Day x DE-Wawa-LT
6. Please enjoy a jewel of a quote from Sahith on the rough around the greens.
I don't know how to describe it, but it's like an unripened banana. It's so sticky.
I haven't played a lot of Northeast golf, so I don't know if this is the normal grass. It kind of threw me for a loop. It kind of squirts both ways for me, like left and right too. Not only is it a distance problem, it's a left and right thing. You can't see the grain because it always kind of sticks up in the air.
Sahith Theegala | 2026 PGA
“An unripened banana,” and “it squirts both ways for me.”
Incredible sport.
7. Not sure how we’re just now getting here, but Scottie with a nose out in front — or alongside several other noses — after 18 holes is obviously going to be an issue.
It’s not over for two reasons …
He’s doing a lot of work with this putter
There are 48 players (!!!) between E and -3
But a golf course where distance control is paramount and you have to continuously make smart decisions even in the face of tempting pin positions and nobody leads Scottie after the first day?
Best of luck to the field!
8. Brooks is about to be a problem as well. The five-time champ flushed it all day and finished 138th in putting (one-hundred and thirty-eighth!). He knows it, too.
Every round just seems to be the worst I can shoot. Putter is absolutely horrendous. Ball striking is absolutely phenomenal. That's been the story of the year. Hopefully we can figure out a way to turn this around.
Brooks Koepka | 2026 PGA
There was never anything crazy, but he only lost strokes on four of 18 approach shots. This on the long 17th stood out to me. Bryson banged one off the right grandstand. Xander went way long left. And Brooks just hit that fierce, whistling iron shot that he hits right to the front middle of the green.
If you can do that 72 times in a row at a major, you’re probably going to lift a trophy at the end of the week.
I don’t know that it’s going to look as easy as it did when he shot 63 at Bethpage in 2019, but Brooks is very much live after Round 1 of this event.
Also, while we’re here, I covet the shoe game and don’t think it gets nearly enough credit. Not the greatest dresser on tour, but the shoes are always awesome.
9. You don’t have to like it, but you do have to respect one of the all time performative athletes of a generation. Come for the “look yourself in the mirror but without a mirror” speech (see video below), and stay for my favorite thing I saw him do on Thursday.
This is all intentionally dramatic, right? Or is he just the most unintentionally dramatic human that has ever lived. I feel upside down at this point. It seems intentional like wink wink watch this. But I truly don’t know. I don’t even know if he totally knows. That’s the place all the performative greats get to: I’m not even sure if this is a bit anymore!
The quote above is amazing (obviously), but my favorite thing Blockie did on Thursday was — and I can’t find it thanks to a DMCA but I wish I could — after he made a short-ish putt early in his round. He followed that by dramatically grabbing his chest in relief — I mean, we are like four holes into the week! — and doing this bent over “I’m so glad to be done with that hole!” walk to the next tee box with the putter sticking straight out behind him like a tail.
It made some of the performative stuff Justin Rose does look tame by comparison.
Truly incredible stuff.
Thank you for reading and participating in all of this nonsense.
Overheard in our Slack channel, which was popping off on Thursday: Is the true test of a major whether you reinstall the governing body’s app the week of? Come on over and get involved! Come agonize with a bunch of grown men over what a 32-year-old milquetoast three-time major winner does with his putter on Friday (and beyond).
Greetings!
I estimate that it will take you around 7 minutes to read today’s newsletter, but it’s impossible to measure things like that so really … who can say?
Name drops today: Blockie (always), Garrick Higgo (of course), Scottie (duh) and unripened bananas.
I’m sorry to whoever we had slotted in today’s sponsorship slot, but I’m going to have to run it back with yesterday’s sponsor, Garmin.
Garrick Higgo, my man, can I interest you in a Garmin S70 for the remainder of the year? Sure, it keeps things like heart rate (yours seems low) and step count (probably high), but it also keeps hours and minutes, and even seconds (!) to keep you from incurring a 2-stroke penalty at your next major championship round.
During your casual golf, you can also measure distance to the front, middle and back of greens — I’m sure all the courses you play are among the 43,000 preloaded into Garmin’s library! — and keep your score right there on the watch face.
It’s a phenomenal device, and given that you’ve made over $7 million in your career, more than affordable for someone in your tax bracket (and most others, too). If you’re reading, you should check it out right here.
OK, now onto the news.
[Jason here] This round 1 scrapple leaderboard goes to six because I would need many more seconds to find a visual that captures Alex Smalley.
1. I did not think we would be leading Round 1 of my PGA thoughts with … Garrick Higgo, but we may have gotten the most normal sport moment(s) of the year about an hour into the golf on Thursday.
Higgo shot 67 but had it bumped up to a 69 because at 7:18:00 a.m. local time, he was not standing on the mown-down green rectangle where his playing partners were teeing off.
Higgo, if you somehow haven’t heard by now, was seconds late to his tee time on Thursday. What is difficult for me to understand is that he actually showed up early, left to hit some putts and then didn’t make it back before the watch of the official running the festivities (maybe he had a Garmin S70?) struck 7:18:00.
I couldn’t get enough of Higgo’s explanation(s). Here were just a few of the sentences he said, with corresponding links to either video or the transcripts.
1. “I was obviously there on time, but late.” (link)
2. “It's unfortunate that golf has these kind of situations where ... things we get penalized for ... things.” (link)
3. "One second is tough to define." (link)
Me reading that third one …
We’re not even close to done!
4. “I wouldn't have been late if I knew I was running late.” (Link)
5. “I was just trying to get evidence. I feel like any of you would have done the same. It's kind of … I was there on time, but the rule is, if you're one second late, you're late. So if you think about it, I was there on time, if you know what I mean.” (Link)
Me …
6. “Like, I was there at 7:18, 30 seconds, you know what I mean?” (Link)
7. (7:18 was the tee time?) “Yeah, or something like that, 7:19, whatever it was. I don't know.” (Link)
Just over here howling at all of this. Completely insane.
Although it led to some all-time commentary on Twitter.
Part of me feels like we should just end the newsletter there. Nothing this week is going to top that. The undercurrent here is that majors always bring about weird stuff like this because majors make for such a strange and uncomfortable environment for players. They are often unaccustomed to how major weeks feel, and so bizarre moments like this that sometimes happen at regular events always seem to happen during these four weeks.
Never miss a f̶a̶i̶r̶w̶a̶y̶ tee time again with the Titleist ProV1 Second.
2. And since we’re talking rules … I know there are probably plenty of purist reasons why this rule exists, but I’m just not sure anyone will ever convince me that a ball hit into the thick rough off of the fairway should be allowed to be placed on the fairway for a second shot like Rahm did on No. 10 today.
Where Rahm hit his tee shot.
Where he hit his second shot from.
That’s not a Rahm subtweet. I said the same thing about Scottie at Oakmont last year and J.J. Spaun at the Players last year, as well.
In a game defined by single shots and often even inches or millimeters (or seconds!), I do not understand how the positioning of a sprinkler head can have such an effect on the outcome of such an important event.
What if Josh Allen slipped on 4th and 1 at the end of the third quarter in the second round of the NFL playoffs next year, and the referees said they were gonna do the play over because there was paint from the Bills logo where he stepped. That’s not that far away from what happened here!
Extreme normal sport behavior, and a rule that I have yet to be convinced makes any sense at all.
This post will continue below for Normal Club members (all 1,049 of them) and includes thoughts on Scottie’s 6-7, an amazing majors course (so far) and more on one of the great performative athletes of our time (somehow not Bryson).
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